Dear Reader,
If there’s an issue of Second Drafts that perhaps breaks the mold, this may be it.
Why? Because I’m giving unsolicited wedding planning advice! Granted, you’ve got plenty of Hot Takes to get through, and I didn’t leave you hanging without a Post(erity) post or Peaches’ Pick, but whether you’re in the mood for love or not, I’ll leave that to you. You’ve been warned.
Speaking of love (or a different kind of it), let me encourage you to make time this Memorial Day to honor those who ultimately loved others (at least according to John 15:13) by laying down their lives for them. We didn’t make it to a service last year due to Covid restrictions, but hope to attend this time around. Take your kids - younger or older - and make it a tradition.
Finally (and only because we’re five responses away from my goal of 50), you can still take my anonymous 10-question Second Drafts survey. I’d appreciate your feedback and comments (and you can read them all after you take it).
That’s it. Enjoy something a little different and, as always, thanks for reading.
Craig (a.k.a. “The Anti-Franck”)
P.S.: As a reminder, you’re welcome and encouraged to email me directly with feedback, ideas, links, etc. at cmdunham [at] gmail [dot] com. Just know that, unless you specifically tell me not to, I may quote you here (though it will always be anonymously).
Hot Takes
“Secret Recordings Reveal Officials Discussing 'Filthy' Conditions of 4,632 Immigrant Kids Held in Texas Tent Camp” - It's not that the media aren't covering this story; they're covering it up so the President and Vice-President don't look bad (how long since Kamala was appointed to “solve” this?).
Come to think of it, I remember when my more progressive friends were all over what was going on along the southern border (and I posted in support and agreed that it was unacceptable), but it seems they've moved on as well, even though the situation has actually become worse (and despite their party being in office). But it’s the secrecy that I find problematic:
“The New York Times reported last week that the Biden administration is planning to expand the shelter to hold up to 10,000 minors. Because the shelter is inside a military base, it is not open to the public or press. Neither are any of the other emergency intake shelters. The photos in this story were snapped by a federal employee and passed to Reason despite an absolute prohibition on taking or sharing images imposed by camp officials.
‘Secrecy is demanded at a level that might be called for if we were designing the next generation of nuclear subs, and there is absolutely no reason for it,’ a federal employee says. ‘One can understand the need to protect the identities of individual children and not allow them to be photographed. But there is no excuse for any of the other secrecy surrounding the operation.’”
A former student who supported the Biden/Harris ticket in November responded to my initial posting of this story via Twitter with some refreshing objectivity:
“To say Biden’s ‘handling’ of this (and the greater ongoing refugee crisis at our southern border) has been disheartening would be too generous. I tried to keep my expectations within reason, knowing campaign promises aren’t trustworthy, but the apathy he and Harris have shown...
Honestly, I’d just hoped for so much more from this administration with regard to border detainment facilities and family separations. Naïve as it was, I really thought they’d give at least a performative effort. Instead, it’s been ‘priest and Levite pass on the other side.’”
He gets it, but I wish more people and members of the media did. If you're going to be angry, be consistent in being so; otherwise, go back to playing politics.
Collage of photos from inside Fort Bliss immigration facility (Source: Anonymous, Reason) “Court Keeps Dorms, Showers Open to Opposite Sex” - In other Biden/Harris news (and as reported here a few months ago), the so-called “Equality Act” is bad news for people and organizations who hold to a traditional view of sex and morality:
“College of the Ozarks must assign students to dormitories and allow them to use bathrooms and showers based on their claimed gender identity, a federal judge ruled on Wednesday. U.S. District Judge Roseann Ketchmark, an Obama appointee, said she would issue a written order soon upholding the Biden administration’s rule.”
This is at a Christian college who, to their credit, is not taking this lying down:
“College of the Ozarks holds to the Christian belief that biological sex is not changeable, and it operates its dorms accordingly. The College’s sincerely held religious beliefs influence their policies, including dormitory policies, which prohibit male students from living in female residence halls, and vice versa.”
Quick story: Back in 1992, I applied and made it pretty far through the interview process to become a resident advisor (a student responsible for the people and programs on his dorm floor) at the University of Missouri in Columbia. In the next-to-last round of interviews (and keep in mind this was almost 30 years ago), I was asked the question, “If you walked into the bathroom and there were two men showering together, what would you say or do?” The (politically) correct answer, of course, was, “Nothing,” but that wasn’t the answer I gave.
As a result, I was disqualified and dismissed on the spot. “Okay,” I remember thinking, “they own the public system, I don’t agree with it, but it’s their prerogative as to why and whom they hire.” I thanked them for the opportunity and left.
What we’re talking about here, however, is a Christian college’s religious rights, historically protected by the Constitution to be able to hold to traditional sexual ethics and mores, now being infringed upon by government. According to the April 19, 2021, edition of World News Group Roundup,
“‘A religious institution should not be forced to betray its religious beliefs,” college President Jerry C. Davis told assembled students and faculty on Thursday. ‘The government’s threats include harmful fines that could easily be in the six-figure range, in addition to damages and unlimited attorney’s fees, if we don’t change our policies.’”
Unfortunately, we’re going to see more and more of this impact at all levels - college, high school, middle school, elementary school - of Christian education, as well as in every denomination of churches. If you are a part of leading any such organizations, you’d better have your ducks in a row in terms of explicitly stating your organization’s religious doctrines and organizational beliefs (ADF can help with this). But even then, it will be interesting to see how these documents stand up in courts of law that may likely recognize less and less the religious sovereignty of colleges and congregations.
Once institutions are no longer free, don’t think for a minute that people will be.
College of the Ozarks is located in Point Lookout, MO. The Babylon Bee definitely stings from a right-of-center political perspective (and increasingly so in recent years), but every now and then, they offer some deserved satirical balance.
Metallica in 2024? “Calvin Prison Initiative Grads Reflect on Education Behind Bars” - Here’s some good news worth celebrating:
“In 2015, Calvin University, Calvin Theological Seminary, and the Michigan Department of Corrections set out on a venture called the Calvin Prison Initiative. It was a first-of-its-kind program in the state of Michigan—one that provides inmates with a chance to earn a bachelor’s-degree from Calvin University behind bars. The goal of the program, which is funded entirely by private donations and grants, is to improve prison culture and curb recidivism rates by equipping prisoners with an education.
On Saturday, May 22, 2021, the first two cohorts—the Class of 2020 and the Class of 2021 CPI graduates—are officially receiving their bachelor’s degrees. While a few graduates have been paroled, most remain behind bars, many serving life sentences. However, through the Calvin education, moral and spiritual formation has taken place, shaping the CPI graduates’ minds and hearts. And it hasn’t stopped there. It’s overflowing and beginning to change the prison culture: illuminating the dark places and restoring hope.”To be inspired, read some of the testimonies in the article. More of this, please.
Photo from the Calvin Prison Initiative website. “Amazon Just Bought MGM for Over $8 Billion. Your Move, Netflix” - Might it be beneficial to at least begin a serious discussion about anti-trust violations?
“The deal, worth $8.45 billion, is the second-largest Amazon acquisition yet, second only to its $13.7 billion purchase of Whole Foods in 2017. It’s also the latest power move in an ongoing battle for turf in the streaming wars, one that signals what streaming services will need to do to ultimately triumph—or at least survive.”
Apart from the possibility that perhaps we have more than enough entertainment options, fewer and fewer people involved in producing and distributing said entertainment seems problematic. Sales and subscriptions already drive the movie industry’s preoccupation with familiar sequels (Fast & Furious 9? Seriously?), and the fewer places one has to watch films just means more platform control by Big Tech.
But it’s not just platform that matters. According to this article in Variety,
“‘The real financial value behind this deal is the treasure trove of [intellectual property] in the deep catalog that we plan to reimagine and develop together with MGM’s talented team,’ Mike Hopkins, senior VP of Prime Video and Amazon Studios, said in announcing the deal. ‘It’s very exciting and provides so many opportunities for high-quality storytelling.’”
Translation: “We want to remake anything we can get our hands on.” Oh, boy.
The Fast & the Furious returns…for the ninth time. “Snowflake Relocates Executive Office from California to Bozeman, Montana, as Company Goes Distributed” - A friend who lives in San Diego and worked in various tech fields sent this to me, writing, “Interesting to see this echo what you’ve been saying for a while.” I'm not making this stuff up, folks. California has Silicon Valley; Montana (especially Bozeman) has Silicon Gulch.
The Crazy Mountains rise to over 11,000 feet and are located north of Interstate-90 between Billings and Bozeman Montana. (Photo by: Education Images/Universal Images Group via Getty Images)
No-Nonsense Nuptials: Top 10 Tips in Time for Wedding Season
As we’re coming into Memorial Day weekend and the official kick-off to summer, let us not forget that June is traditionally considered the most popular month in which to get married because of milder weather, etc. Like many of you, I have been to and been in many a wedding in my day. I’ve even given away a bride of my own flesh and blood.
Along the way, I’ve made mental notes and formulated a few opinions (surprise) about what makes for purposeful and painless (or at least less painful) weddings. So, just in time for wedding season, here’s my “No-Nonsense Nuptials” advice, free of charge.
#10: Remember the Goal
Before you and your betrothed start planning anything, make sure you understand that the purpose of a wedding is to get married. Then (and this is the hard part), make sure you begin your campaign to inform everyone else (parents, family, friends, etc.) that this (getting married) is the goal; everything else is just money.
#9: Guys, Learn to Care
Guys, have an opinion (or if you don’t, form one on the fly) about the details of your wedding – ceremony, colors, invitations, seating charts, etc. It may not matter to you what font is on the reception napkin (or if you have a reception at all), but don’t tell that to your bride-to-be (the last thing she wants to hear is “I don’t care”). Get into the habit of learning to care and making decisions; these, after all, will be part of your role as a husband.
#8: Ladies, Go Easy
Ladies, don’t make this harder than it needs to be (again, see #10). Regardless of your mother’s opinions or your childhood Barbie fantasies concerning your wedding day, you are the one who will determine which voices will speak into the planning and how loudly they will be allowed to speak. Set mutually-agreed upon expectations with your spouse and your families as to who all is going to be involved and what you are asking them to do before anybody does anything (otherwise, you’ll have this same conversation on the backend of things, only with a lot more tension and tears).
#7: Keep the Party Small
As a rule, keep the size of your wedding party to a reasonable number; in other words, twelve bridesmaids and twelve groomsmen is overkill. Pick three or four people who mean something to you and be done; if someone is upset, it’s his or her problem and this is a chance to learn the lesson that someone else’s wedding is not about his or her standing up in it. Same with your cousin who really, really, really wants to sing – only if that’s what you and your spouse want; decide and stick to your guns.
#6: Rehearsals Require Leadership
When you get to the wedding weekend, make sure someone is in charge of running the wedding rehearsal, and make sure everyone knows he or she is in charge of running the wedding rehearsal. Whether with your pastor, a wedding coordinator, or you and/or your spouse, all the details should have been talked through, and someone needs to step up and lead. I’ve been in wedding rehearsals that were unnecessarily three hours long, but this should not be. (Note: The same principle applies to pictures – know what pictures you want and make sure someone - preferably the photographer - leads out in getting them taken.)
#5: Remember the Goal (Again)
It’s at this point that you need to remind yourself of #10 again. Regardless of what happens at the rehearsal, the rehearsal dinner, getting ready the morning of, taking pictures, going through the ceremony, etc., regardless if everything does (or doesn’t) go exactly according to schedule or design, relax. Remember, the goal of a wedding is to get married. Odds are if you can endure the process (and unless the world literally ends), that goal will more than likely be realized.
#4: Pray
Sometime in the last half hour before the ceremony, guys, have your groomsmen pray for you; ladies, have your bridesmaids do the same. If something’s not done by now, it’s not going to get done, so do something that will both calm your nerves and also help you feel the gravity of what you’re about to do. Both are necessary.
#3: Keep It Short
Regarding the ceremony, strive to keep it short (30 minutes is plenty) and make sure the Scriptures and not some cutesy story or homily are presented in the pastor’s charge to you. This is your marriage, for crying out loud, and you’re making vows before God and man. If you don’t take that seriously on your wedding day before God and everybody, how seriously will you take your vows when it’s just you and your spouse?
Don’t lock your knees. Breathe. Look each other in the eye. Memorize your vows. Hold each other’s hands. Push on the ring (but only halfway in case fingers are swollen). Remember to say, “I do.” Kiss (but don’t get ridiculous). Smile.
#2: Keep It Simple and Classy
Cake and punch receptions are nothing to be ashamed of (and can save everyone a whole lot of money, time, hassle, and pride). This is one of the very few times in life you get to have your cake and eat it, too, so relish it (and have good wedding punch – gotta love good wedding punch). But don’t force-feed the cake to your spouse – it’s tacky and doesn’t fall under the “cherish your beloved” idea to which you just committed yourself thirty minutes earlier.
If you’re going to have a meal and music at your reception, fine, but make sure your emcee has experience in front of people (your wedding is not the time to give him or her his first big break, especially if you’re related – could make for awkward holidays for years to come). And, just like with the wedding rehearsal, make sure someone has a plan and is in charge of getting the food served.
#1: Enjoy and Rejoice
Regardless of its kind, enjoy your reception and try to make your way around the room to personally see everyone who came. Many of them probably traveled a good ways to be there; the least you can do is say thanks in person. Have fun, don’t worry about eating, and appreciate the surreal reality that God has brought and used these people in your life in some way. If you can capture this moment in your mind, it will be a memorable highlight for the rest of your life.
Congratulations! You’re married, which was the goal from the beginning, remember?
(Note: Thanks to Bruce and Maddie Clark for permission to use their wedding photos as post illustrations. I also left the name of the photographer on the pics as Truett is my nephew and lives in Kansas City. If in need of a photographer for your wedding or event, visit his website.)
Post(erity): “All Must Be Well”
Each week, I choose a post from the past that seems apropos of something (of course, you’re always welcome to search the archives yourself whenever you like).
This week’s post, “All Must Be Well,” comes from March 22, 2009. An excerpt:
“For me, the afternoon was an insightful one: in light of the good but sobering discussion with Mom at lunch, I needed the reassurance of Christ's relationship with his Church that a marriage ceremony can provide; despite the pressures of the day, I saw parents who didn't make their daughter’s marriage all about them (or even about her), but about Christ’s relationship with his Church; and, strangely for the first time, I imagined my own daughters getting married - each with her three sisters as bridesmaids - and prayed that their weddings would reflect Christ’s relationship with his Church as well...even if there’s little money to pay for them...or even less morality left in our culture to care.”
Peaches’ Picks
Peaches and I finished this one over a weekend a few weeks ago - a pretty fast read meant as a sequel to Greg McKeown’s first book, Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less (such a great subtitle), which I liked better and struck me as much more original. Effortless wasn't bad; just a little oversimplified and basic, both in the content and the writing style. Read Essentialism first and, if you like it, pick up Effortless later.
Fresh & Random Linkage
“Yellowstone Rangers Are Looking for Woman Who Approached Grizzly Bear with Her Phone” - And so it begins…again…every spring…always.
Until next time.
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