Where Have All My Deep Male Friendships Gone? | Ted Cruz and Tucker Carlson's Blowup | Oliver Anthony Drops Scorching Song “Scornful Woman”
Deconstructing Modern Manhood, Political Agendas & the Price of Popularity
Dear Reader,
Thanks for hanging with me amidst the plethora of personal posts earlier this week (Father’s Day, ministry update). We now return you to our regular Second Drafts programming. Sources and articles for this issue include:
The New York Times Magazine: “Where Have All My Deep Male Friendships Gone?”
Axios.com: “Ted Cruz and Tucker Carlson's Blowup Exposes MAGA’s Divide on War with Iran”
Billboard.com: “Oliver Anthony Drops Scorching Song ‘Scornful Woman’ About His Divorce & Money”
Don’t forget to rank the stories below…and maybe leave a comment or two!
As always, thanks for reading Second Drafts,
Craig
PS: Megan and I will be in Chattanooga Monday through Friday next week for the Presbyterian Church in America’s General Assembly. If you go, look us up (Megan will likely be at the curriculum tables while I’ll be the one in khaki pants).
#1: Where Have All My Deep Male Friendships Gone?
One of the advantages of publishing every couple of weeks (as opposed to every day or even every week) is you sometimes catch larger themes developing within the daily stories others are reading, writing about, or commenting on.
One such example has to do with men. The New York Times Magazine published an article titled “Where Have All My Deep Male Friendships Gone?” in late May, claiming that men everywhere are experiencing loneliness. Somewhat autobiographically, author Sam Graham-Felsen explained,
“I know I’m still capable of connecting deeply with friends, but it would be a stretch to say that I’m close to them the way I once was. I hardly ever talk on the phone with my friends, and rarely spend time with them one-on-one. On the rare occasion that I do, it’s usually in the context of—or rather, under the pretext of—watching a game. Then, with eyes directed at a screen, we discuss topics: politics, podcasts, food, fitness routines, the game itself. Maybe we’ll playfully smack-talk a fellow friend, or commiserate about some schleppy aspect of parenthood. Rarely (as in, never) do we turn to each other and ask: ‘How are you doing?’”
Loneliness not withstanding, the world of politics is plenty interested in helping men—particularly young men—find friends and a place to politically call home. Democrats hired self-described “queer, plus-size, disabled Latina” influencer Olivia Julianna and are spending $20 million dollars to study young men. What assumptions underlie these choices? How might they be perceived by the target audience? Cultural critic Aaron Renn argues that it might not take much more than these attempts to work if for no other reason than Republican contempt:
“The Democrats realize they have a man problem, namely that they are losing men’s votes. Their efforts to diagnose and address this problem to date have been cringey to say the least.
But it would be a big mistake to think that it’s impossible for Democrats to lure men back. While that party has internal dynamics that make it difficult to appeal to men, traditional Republicans also hate men, and often openly and harshly criticize them.”
To illustrate, Renn linked to a screen cap of the conservative Ingraham Angle show:
Continues Renn:
“Since both parties basically hate men, if Democrats simply stopped overtly hating on men, a large chunk of them would be very open to voting Democrat. In fact, not that long ago, many of them like Joe Rogan actually were much greater supporters for the left. Most men are non-religious, want to indulge their appetites, and aren’t interested in moralistic scolding—particularly when it’s clearly directed only at them. So whoever stops kicking them first will have a lot of appeal.”
Anthony Bradley offers his analysis, championing more risk-taking as a solution:
“We are now witnessing the consequences of this cultural failure across every corner of American society. A generation of young men between the ages of 18 and 24 is drifting through life, trapped in extended adolescence. Some are enrolled in college, some are living at home and not doing hard work—but across all contexts, the crisis is the same: they are not being exposed to enough real risk, challenge, or responsibility to mature into capable men.
The failure is not primarily one of laziness or incompetence. It is a failure of formation. We have engineered a culture that allows young men to extend the comforts of childhood indefinitely. Instead of forcing them to confront the disorientation and pressure that historically forged maturity, we insulate them from hardship with a steady diet of familiarity, safety, and predictability. The result is millions of young men who may look like adults on the outside but are still boys internally.”
Not much I can add to Bradley’s paragraphs or the whole of his perspective, as his analysis offers a compelling lens. What specific “risks, challenges, or responsibilities” are most lacking for young men today, and how might those be reintroduced? How does Bradley's “failure of formation” perspective intersect with or diverge from Renn's political critique? The answers have consequences.
#2: Ted Cruz and Tucker Carlson's Blowup Exposes MAGA's Divide on War with Iran
I won’t pretend to know all or any of the pros and cons of expanding U.S. involvement in the Middle East, but one thing I will suggest is to not look for Scriptural justification from the vast majority of our elected political officials.
What are the potential dangers or implications when politicians use selective biblical interpretations to justify foreign policy? Case in point: Texas senator Ted Cruz’s recent interview with Tucker Carlson, as reported by The Christian Post, in which Cruz shares the theology of his political perspective:
“After earlier stating he [Cruz] first ran for Congress in 2012 ‘with the stated intention of being the leading defender of Israel in the United States Senate,’ Cruz offered a twofold explanation, rooted first in his Christian faith. ‘As a Christian, growing up in Sunday school, I was taught from the Bible that those who bless Israel will be blessed, and those who curse Israel will be cursed. I want to be on the blessing side of things,’ he stated, an apparent reference to Genesis 12:3.
Cruz’s biblical reference drew immediate scrutiny. ‘Those who bless the government of Israel?’ Carlson countered.
‘Those who bless Israel is what it says, it doesn’t say the government of, it says the nation of Israel,’ Cruz replied.”
Carlson, whatever one thinks of his usual persona, here serves as an important interrogator, challenging a widely held assumption and position that has so often been used to justify carte blanche U.S. support of Israel, regardless of situation.
“When Cruz struggled to pinpoint the chapter and verse, Carlson questioned his theological grounding. ‘You’re quoting a Bible phrase you don’t have context for, you don’t know where in the Bible it is, and that’s your theology? I’m confused…I’m a Christian, I want to know what you’re talking about,’ Carlson said.
Cruz explained his support for Israel is based on the Bible. ‘Biblically, we are commanded to support Israel. Second—’ ‘Hold on,’ Carlson interjected. ‘We’re commanded as Christians to support the government of Israel?’
When pressed whether he believes ‘what God was talking about in Genesis’ is a ‘political entity that’s existed for thousands of years, though it was recreated just over 70 years ago,’ Cruz replied, ‘Yes, but most people understand that line in Genesis to refer to the Jewish people, God’s chosen people.’”
To be sure, the identity of Israel (past, present, and especially future) is and always has been tricky. But here, the reality is that the modern state of Israel is not the the same as the ancient nation of Israel, at least not from the more historical eschatological views of Scripture long held by the Church. These seem of new interest to a new and younger demographic of folks, as The Christian Post acknowledges:
“The debate over the identity of the modern-day political state comes as the number of young Evangelicals in the United States who support Israel and view it as a sign of the End Times is declining, as amillennial and postmillennial eschatology grows in popularity.”
As the article on eschatology aptly notes, not all of this shift has theological underpinnings, but neither are younger folks automatically accepting more dispensational teachings of the past 100 or so years, made initially popular by the Scofield Reference Bible and more familiar due to The Left Behind fiction series.
I won’t go into it all here, but if you’re interested, I wrote a more in-depth post about the various end-times views when Hamas invaded Israel in October 2023. Folks were trying to figure out what any of it might mean then, and from what I’ve seen on the Interwebs the past few days, even more are trying to figure it out now, particularly with President Trump’s on-again, off-again saber-rattling in response to Iran’s attack on Israel and with a goal of eliminating their nuclear capabilities.
#3: Oliver Anthony Drops Scorching Song “Scornful Woman” About His Divorce & Money
Back in September 2023, I wrote the following about Oliver Anthony and his then-viral hit song, “Rich Men North of Richmond”:
“I feel for him being thrust into the limelight so harshly, but he seems to be handling it pretty well (this interview clip with Joe Rogan is very grounded). Will he stay independent and resist those who come courting musically or politically? And in what kind of soil will the seeds of his recent conversion grow? While I wish him the best, I wonder if his 15 minutes of fame are almost up, as I don’t think he’s a strong enough writer to keep people’s attention for too much longer. Songwriting is hard.”
I hadn’t thought much about Anthony since then, but this week I came across this article at Billboard.com reporting Anthony was recently divorced by his wife and now has a new song out about how she got half his money. The official video:
According to Billboard.com,
“If the lyrics of the June-released song are to be taken as autobiographical, Anthony implies that his wife is shaking him down for money amid legal proceedings following the dissolution of their marriage. The Virginia resident has kept his personal life out of the public eye, but it is known that he had a wife and kids when he first blew up in 2023 with “Rich Men North of Richmond.”
Providing a little more background, the story continued:
“It’s been nearly two years since Anthony went from unknown to Billboard Hot 100-topping artist in a matter of days. After a video of him performing his independently released single ‘Rich Men North of Richmond’ went mega viral, the ballad debuted at No. 1 on the singles chart, making him the first artist to ever do so without having appeared on it previously.”
In my September 2023 post, I reported basically the same info, but with a twist:
“The song shot up to number one (whatever that means—does anyone even buy music anymore?)—but brought along with it plenty of people and politicos trying to make it mean what they wanted it to mean.”
What responsibilities, if any, do the public, media, and political figures have when amplifying a raw, unpolished talent like Anthony’s? How does his story challenge our perceptions of success and personal well-being in the age of viral fame? Sadly, I imagine those powers-that-be and their political pressures never subsided, and Anthony and his wife would seem to have been caught in the middle. At least the lyrics to the new tune don’t seem to suggest otherwise:
“She can have all the money
And they can keep all the fame
I'd go back to being broke as a joke
If I could just get a break from the pain”
The only thing worse than watching for wolves during a meteoric rise to fame is a fall that includes the departure of those beloved at your side. Sad for all involved.
“Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate.”
—Emily Dickinson
I’m in that season of life where my interaction with male friends consists almost exclusively of texting each other politically incorrect memes or posting on their blogs. I honestly can’t recall the last time I sat in the room with a bro and watched a ballgame.
For me, the loneliness “epidemic” is not an epidemic, but rather is just endemic. It’s no longer something to fix. It’s just part of the air now.
. . .
The Democrats' successes or failures with men seem less indicative of their failures with men as much as it is an apparent fixation with doubling down on the "20" aspect of the 80-20 rule. Say what you want about Trump, the guy understands the power of the wedge issue and when to avoid third rails in his constituency.
Until the DNC stops appealing to the fringe and embraces its base, they'll continue to step on rakes.
. . .
And maybe this says more about how aggressively I’ve curated my various feeds, but I had almost completely forgotten the existence of Ted Cruz and Tucker Carlson.
Your point about “Israel” and “Israel” landed, though. As a Reformed Baptist in an SBC congregation, the Dispensationalism is real, yo.
. . .
P.S. I loved the new Oliver Anthony track. The second it dropped, I sent it to the two or three divorced dad bros I know who, years later, are *still* trying to rebuild their lives after the ravages of one-sided divorce and custody battles.
"The result is millions of young men who may look like adults on the outside but are still boys internally"
I agree and sadly I feel the same way about "Christians" in America...
Ryan Holiday and David Brooks have expressed similar sentiments in their books The Obstacle Is the Way, and The Road to Character. We seem to be "depth deficient" in almost every area of our existence EXCEPT quick access to media and entertainment.